On Benches

I live in a loft apartment. Walks have become my saving grace during quarantine. On one of my beloved outings, I happened upon a bench. The light was hitting it just right and it called out, “you can sit here.” An invitation. A warm welcome. Permission to rest. 

I accepted the offer and sat down. Immediately, the day appeared brighter. I was more attuned to the sounds and smells around me. It brought me back to Paris. 

Moving to France was as terrifying as it was exhilarating. Feeling like I belonged was taking more time than I’d anticipated. My host family was incredible, but the moment I stepped out on my own, it was easy to feel lost. And then I found my bench. 

My feet and the metro were my sole modes of transportation in Paris, so whenever I’d go visit the beauty that is Tour Eiffel, I’d come from the metro line that connected directly with the area I lived in the 12th Arrondissement. It was a back route of sorts, placing me at a less populous “back” side of the Eiffel Tower. Perfectly centered at the base was my bench. Every time I came to it, it was empty. Waiting for me. 

I did a lot of thinking there. I belonged. Whenever visitors came, I’d take them there. My parents sat there on my mom’s birthday, celebrating 35 years of marriage. There’s just something about benches.

A bench it is kind of a place that you have people go find it and sit on it too. They find it when they go into a park or on a walk or something around the lake they find a bench to sit down and relax and rest before you continue with the walk.

It is a place to rest your feet for a while to look around at the beauty and the other word I am thinking of is the pretty surroundings around like the water or ocean and lake and flowers and trees. And when the colors change on the trees.

You can also sit on the bench in the evening to see the beautiful sunsets.

A place to go before you continue with the walk. It’s a pause. It’s where we find the encouragement we need to keep going. Sometimes alone, sometimes next to others. 

I would be doing a disservice to the bench if I didn’t mention Forrest Gump in this post. The iconic spot that gifted the world with the quote, “life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get.” 

The movie that I think about with benches is Mission Impossible. I think it is the first one and the one that is Rogue Nation #4 and they talk together on the bench. It is a place where they meet together.

In Notting Hill they sit on a bench in the garden and it is a place to be together.

And also in Music of the Heart with Meryl Streep and Gloria Estefan there was a bench at the school outside when they are introduced to each other.

I have one other thing I want to tell you when to use a bench is that you can use a bench to put it on a dance stage and start a dance performance routine with the bench as a prop. They do this on So You Think You Can Dance. 

Benches host conversations between friends, flings, and families. Imagine the stories they could tell. It’s no wonder they show up in so many movies. 

I recently joined a writing community called hope*writers. A part of their manifesto is the phrase, “We build benches, not platforms.” “Platform” is a term that comes up often in publishing. Hope*writers believes that word suggests the writer is standing above and shouting down to their readers. “Benches” illustrates community and interaction. An invitation for conversation. Belonging. 

If someone is on the bench you can say “hi it is okay for me to sit down here.” (Staying 6 feet apart, of course).

The next time you stumble upon a bench, take a seat. Maybe Clorox Wipe it first:). Then soak in your surroundings. And if you don’t feel like sitting down, incorporate it into a dance routine like Leah said. Why not? Times are weird.

Here’s to turning our minds Upside Down.